The Difference Between
There was a time
we met by water, day was light and cool,
the water moved as it is wont
to do. You moved me with your words,
or was it with your silence.
The years have passed and silence too
and words as they are wont to do.
There are days
you can't remember water,
how it moves, or the difference between
silence and our words.
Post in honor of One Shot Wednesday.
Labels: One Stop Poetry, poetry
posted by L.L. Barkat at 2:27 PM
32 Comments:
If I had to give a prize for this OSW, here it'd come!
meaninfully and beautifully written!
Thanks L.L.
:)
Dulce
this is beautiful, the confluence of it; it is tender, lyrical-- a lovely piece. xj
This is tinged with sadness, a lyrical kind of sadness, as if love was almost lost but is still there, fading.
This is beautiful, L.L.
I'd say this pretty much captures a real marriage. Well done.
smiles. this was a gorgeous write filled with feeling...i love how you wrap it around...and i imagine this is growing old together...
So bittersweet. The love remains, even in the fading. It's very beautiful, and it makes me sad...
This... this is one of my favorites from you...
Just a wonderful and thoughtful poem that has a perfect lyrical touch....leaves a sigh in the heart...blessings...bkm
Sometimes there is comfort in both words and in silence. I love the repetition. It reminds me how in 7 years of marriage I am often wont to repeat myself!
Beautiful and poignant.
Beautiful and lyrical and tender.
Lovely work.
The last couple of lines are filled with intimacy, at least for me. Lovely.
I love the circular motion of this poem.
relational poems always get me in the gut. reminds me sometime of the older couples out to breakfast with nary a word spoken the whole time.
your poem carries so many layers of symbolism with it - love, communication, time
mmm
Thanks for the One Shot
moonie
This is a really pretty write.
A lament. An acceptance. Made me feel sad and at peace with it.
Wow, Laura. I love this. Water, words, circles--it's pretty perfect. :)
A beautiful little slice of life!
Love this poem - spare line breaks make for even more emotional intensity between the thens and nows.
The lovely soft memories now dotted with hints of sadness... oh how beautifully you have captured it all here!!
Stunning, and so moving...
Most of a lifetime of feeling in such a small space as large as the ocean.
Thanks so much. I am constantly amazed at your talent for putting so much in that small space.
oh! LOVE! i think i want more of the silence between my beloved and i, so, well, this just wraps me up in hope the journey longer...
oh! LOVE! i think i want more of the silence between my beloved and i, so, well, this just wraps me up in hope the journey longer...
Very beautiful... soft and evocative...
ॐ नमः शिवाय
Om Namah Shivaya
http://shadowdancingwithmind.blogspot.com/2011/03/whispers-winter-dew.html
Twitter @VerseEveryDay
Great short poem. Moved by both words and silence. I've been there before.
Deep. My mind is walking the path of your words...
Really nice words, you made me stop chasing the birds.
As I wanted to read right to the end, big props on the read I send.
Now the cat must go and search out another foe.
I like it. Kind of puts you in another place. Or helps you understand better the place you're in.
sometimes we exchange more with silence than with words - i like the way your words reminded me of that truth
This is beautifully written and captures sadness overtaking the years of sharing both the silence and the words. Perhaps the mind is drifting away and someone is being lost.
Beautiful
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